


Jack of All Trades, Master of Some

by JumpStreet



Category: Firefly, Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Allison is a Disney Princess, BAMF Laura Hale, BAMF Lydia Martin, But not until much, Except for not really - Freeform, Laua Hale being awesome, Mal is hopeless, Multi, Stiles & Derek will show up eventually, it's complicated - Freeform, much later, scott is a puppy, they're all human
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-11
Updated: 2014-05-12
Packaged: 2018-01-24 09:11:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1599476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JumpStreet/pseuds/JumpStreet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Laura Hale is a Jack-of-All-Trades, a child of wanderlust and born for a life in the black. She can do just about any job needed for a ship of honorable thieves and criminals but she’s not the best and never will be. Laura would much rather be competent in everything than be a master of one particular skill.</p><p> </p><p>Little does she know she is about to become the specialist in the ‘Verse’s rarest commodity – a small slip of a girl by the name of River Tam. Because it takes a very wide skill set to keep up with an insane genius and danger – well. Danger calls to danger, and they both have it in spades.</p><p> </p><p>Or the one where Mal is a Hale, owns Serenity and fills it with Teen Wolf characters. But River Tam is still River Tam</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Welcome to the Black

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah, this is happening. Everyone is going to be a mix of their Teen Wolf self and a Firefly counterpart. I'm going to follow the Firefly plot moreso than the Teen wolf one but I expect a good mix of the two to happen. If you want a certain part of either, let me know and I'll try to get it in. Cheers!

 

 

 

Laura Hale is the embodiment of the phrase “Jack of all trades, master of none.”

 

 

She’s sensible, strong and hard like her Captain’s second Boyd but unable to keep the same quiet stoicism that was born in his bones. She gives her advice when asked, punches their Captain when needed but never provides counsel. She doesn't like the responsibility.

 

 

Laura is a warrior, quick and dirty with only slightly better morals than their merc Jackie. Whittemore is a whoring, crude, pompous jackass and Laura is only _slightly_ crude but very bitchy. They both like bars just the same; him for the girls, her for the fights.

 

 

She’s fierce and independent, like Boyd’s wife Erica Washburne née Reyes. But while Laura can out-sass the best of them, she’s got nothing on their fiery blonde pilot who, only one year younger and is all sharp points and cuttingly sarcastic remarks. Laura’s smile is far more dangerous than any Erica can come up with but Laura doesn’t wear it like armor, like a shield against the worlds.

 

 

Laura has seen the worst the Verse has to offer, same as Erica, but she doesn't expect the worst of everyone they meet. She managed to keep some of that blindingly chipper sunshine their young Chief Engineer and self-proclaimed Head Cheerfulness Officer Ally Frye is famous for. Laura hung onto that patch of brightness by the skin of her teeth, even in the darkest corners of the darkest moons. Laura can still see the good in people; can still see the good in life even if it isn't the same unfailing (and often naïve) optimism Ally carries with her everywhere.

 

 

Laura is fluid as she moves, tall and lithe; not with the same grace and elegance ingrained into Inara’s step, but with a natural ease that’s just as magnetic. They’re both beautiful – stunning really – yet as different as can be. Laura’s smile is feral, her eyes a warning even as her body taunts and her movements tease, daring to be approached but few, so very few, are foolish enough to try.

 

 

Inara Serra is sophistication and refinement, as a Companion should be. She’s older than Laura – not than anyone could tell. Her age is immortal; not young, not old, not fathomable and never questioned. She’s curves where Laura is hard angles and seduction where Laura is raw allure. Her smile is the most genuine fake you will ever be lucky enough to bear witness to, especially since not even the people who purchase it can see its artifice. That honor is reserved for Laura and Laura alone because she is the only person Inara trusts enough to let the illusion falter.

 

 

But none trust Laura more than her brother Captain Malcolm Reynolds, older by six years, eleven months and two days. Twenty-seven years of age and Laura still doesn't understand why Mal insists on going by his middle name. He’s a Hale same as her.  They have the same black hair and defined jaw, the same sloping nose and high cheekbones. And they both carry that unmistakable air of danger – of wildness – that’s barely hidden in their hazel eyes and built in to their snarling smiles. They wear it like they wear the guns on their hips and knives in their boots. They ooze Hale like they ooze confidence.

 

 

Mal still insists on going by Reynolds, though, and claims it’s to protect ‘me and mine’. Laura understands the sentiment, she really does – she would protect her family until her dying breath (both the blood ties on Beacon and the crew on Serenity) – but Mal is a Hale and everyone in the gorram Verse knows it.

 

 

Laura never quite gets her _ge ge_ , but the parts she doesn't understand Boyd does. It’s like that for a lot of things.

 

 

Laura is a generalist. She knows her brother but Boyd knows his nuances.

 

 

Laura can fight, she can shoot and gorram, can she work a blade but Jackie is better.

 

 

She knows how to fly Serenity but Erica can make their ship float a leaf on the wind.

 

 

Laura can fix Serenity’s engine but Ally can talk to the old Firefly and understand the reply.

 

 

Laura can tempt and she can captivate but she can’t play a man like she plays her guitar, can’t enslave her victims with a wink and a coy smile. She’s a siren but Inara is the goddess of sin.

 

 

Laura can command the respect of her crew but she can’t lead them, not like Mal can.

 

 

Laura is a Jack-of-All-Trades, a child of wanderlust and born for a life in the black. She can do just about any job needed for a ship of honorable thieves and criminals but she’s not the best and never will be. Laura would much rather be competent in everything than be a master of one particular skill.

 

 

Little does she know she is about to become the specialist in the ‘Verse’s rarest commodity – a small slip of a girl by the name of River Tam. Because it takes a very wide skill set to keep up with an insane genius and danger – well. Danger calls to danger, and they both have it in spades.

 

 

 


	2. Passengers (Part 1)

**Excerpts from _A Brief History of the Verse_**

>  
> 
> ….The Alliance1 are widely believed to be the perpetrators of the Unification War. They tried to expand their influence from the richer and well-established central planets to the poor and more recently terraformed2 Border or Rim planets.
> 
> While the Rim was less “civilized” – with little to no infrastructure, outdated technology and limited medical supplies – they were proud people. They believed in the system of being left alone and leaving left alone, handling their own problems as they came up.
> 
> The Alliance, with their intent of collectivizing all the planets and moons under their banner, launched what they called the “War of Unification” more commonly referred to as the “War for Independence”. The Border Planets, called the “Independents” or “Browncoats”, faced off against the better equipped, better trained Alliance forces from the years 2506 to 2511…
> 
> …The turning point of the War came with the Battle of Serenity Valley (2511) on Hera, arguably one of the bloodiest battles fought in human history. The vicious seven week campaign is theorized to have one of the highest body counts of any engagement. It was a decisive defeat for the Independents and often regarded as the battle that lost the war.
> 
> The Independents held out for a little while longer past their defeat on Hera but soon signed an Armistice agreement with the Alliance leading to….
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> The Alliance1: a collection of allied planets – often referred to as the “Core” or “Central” planets – unified under a single Parliamentary system and policed by a single Federal force
> 
> Terraformed2: The scientific process of changing key characteristics of uninhabitable planets or moons in order to make them livable. The goal is to make them as close to The-Earth-That-Was as possible, though there are quirks on every planet/moon that make each unique.
> 
>  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mal is an idiot. A complete and total idiot that Laura consistently wants to strangle, older brother be damned. No one can make as many consecutively bad decisions as her Captain can while still managing to end up on top. The man has the worst luck and the best luck all wrapped up in big bag of irony, tied together with a very thick rope of incredulity. The Verse can’t seem to decide if it loves or hates Malcolm Reynolds and Laura is tired of it.

 

First he manages to fuck up the exchange with Badger, which really? How? It was such a simple job. Get the goods, show up on Persephone, trade their stolen cargo for some cashy money then git. It’s not hard. They didn’t even get properly tagged by that damn Alliance cruiser back at the salvage site.    

 

Then she finds out that they literally stole Alliance stamped goods.

 

And just… Laura cannot even. Like, fuck you Mal, really? Alliance goods? Are we trying to get arrested by the gorram Feds? She understands why Badger wouldn’t take their cargo now. No “legitimate” businessman ( _Dyton asshole middleman_ ) would take filched Alliance marked goods from a Captain that got identified by a Cruiser just hours before. 

 

She’s going to say it again because it makes her feel better – her brother is an _idiot_.

 

Then to make it worse (and Laura honestly didn’t think it was possible) Mal is going to invite passengers onto Serenity. Fucking _passengers_. Four of them.

 

Laura _hates_ passengers.

 

Ally can take her ‘I love meeting new people’ and shove it up her ass because new people mean a shit ton of trouble that Laura frankly doesn’t have the patience to deal with.

 

It also means strangers wandering around _her_ boat (Laura has problems with sharing) while it’s stuffed full with illegal cargo. They were so fucked.

 

The only silver lining she sees right now is that _Serenity_ is a Firefly-class transport ship. These babies were practically made for smugglers and thieves, with all their hidey-holes and secret compartments. It’s easy to hide things on Serenity but much harder to find them if you don’t know where you’re looking so it’s (hopefully) pretty unlikely for any of their passengers to stumble over their illegal salvage.

 

 

And Mal even gave her permission to shoot them if they get too nosy which is all kinds of shiny. She just has to do it, you know, politely. They’re paying passengers after all.

 

Laura grins. She loves her brother.

 

He’s still an idiot, though.

 

 

 

“What we got?” Laura asks sitting on the metal grating of one of the high catwalks next to Jackie (she will never call him Jackson, ever) and looking down at the cargo bay. There’re four passengers milling around – along with Ally, Boyd and Mal – fiddling with their luggage and waiting for take-off.

 

“Two puppies, a very fine piece of ass and dolt.” Jackie replies pompously with a snort, pulling himself up and ambling towards the mess. Laura glares at their merc’s  back as he walks away. Douche.

 

She looks back down but can’t help and agree with his (crude) assessment.

 

There’s two twenty-something boys both standing close together near the still open bay door. One looks younger with a crooked jaw and an adorably confused face that Laura just wants to coo at. He’s shorter, stockier and darker than his companion and has a certain innocent naïveté to him. It reminds Laura of Ally.

_Speak of the devil_ Laura thinks with a smirk and watches as their mechanic walks over. She starts shyly flirting with Crooked Jaw and he looks back at her with such hopeful doe eyes that Laura almost starts laughing out loud.

 

She almost wishes that Crooked Jaw would stay on _Serenity_ a little longer than Boros just so Laura can relentlessly tease the pair. They both look equally smitten (Laura has _never_ seen Ally blush so hard) and judging by Crooked Jaw’s tongue-tied responses their courtship will end up with both of them pining desperately, neither willing to make the first move. Laura is sure it will be the more entertaining than the time Mal accidently got high on engine fumes.

 

(Best gorram thing Laura had ever seen. Who knew her brother enjoyed naked off-key opera singing?)

 

The other puppy, the tall blonde one with a shock of curly blonde hair seems of a similar opinion based off his fondly exasperated look at Crooked Jaw. Laura thinks that she’d like Blondie and not just because he brought them fresh vegetables and real spices to share with meals. (Protein – no matter what color – gets real old real fast)

 

He seems the bashful type, shyly refusing Ally’s thanks as he hands her the food sack, cheeks stained bright red. But Laura thinks there’s a bit of darkness in the kid for all his embarrassed smiles and quiet nature. Laura can see it in his eyes, in the way his lips turn up slightly at Ally and her optimism. It’s indulgent, like he doesn’t want to take away her sunshine but knows how childlike it is. The kid’s seen shit, Laura’s sure of it.

 

Her eyes roam to the edge of the bay where there’s a woman studying a large metal container with a practiced eye.

 

The fine piece of ass is just that, fine and Laura understands Jackie’s appreciation of the woman. She’s small but she’s beautiful, with strawberry blonde hair tied up in a sleek bun and a well-pressed three piece pantsuit that should look masculine but really, really doesn’t.

 

Laura wouldn’t tap that in a million years.

 

One, Laura is positive that the woman does not bat for her team –which, shame. But more importantly, she’s just not who Laura would even casually fuck. The strawberry blonde looks terrifying, cold angles and calculations. She looks manipulative and bitchy and twice as intelligent as Laura is but not in a good way. If anything, Laura wants to be her new best friend. Strawberry Blonde is the kind of girl Laura wants in her corner.

 

The dolt – and Laura really wants to agree with Jackie’s judgment here because the dude just tripped over a nonexistent bolt on the floor – unfortunately doesn’t scream dolt to her. Sure he’s clumsy but it seems forced in a way and he’s just way too polite.

 

Laura, as a general principle, does not trust polite people. They try too hard and it makes her feel like they’re hiding something. Dolt feels that way and Laura doesn’t like it. She makes a mental note to watch him then pulls herself up off the catwalk. She stretches, hears her back crack satisfyingly then wanders after Jackie to the mess.

 

This set doesn’t seem too bad. Not like that one bunch they picked up on Juno.

 

(Laura swore never to step foot anywhere near that moon after that week of hell)

 

She sighs as she reaches the kitchen and throws herself on one of the comfier couches lining the walls.

 

She still hates passengers.

 

 

 

 

 

Laura surprises herself when she actually learns all their names. Normally she only refers to them by physical characteristics out of spite. But Crooked Jaw’s name is Scott McCall and Blondie’s is Isaac Book even though Scott insists on calling him Shepard. McCall also claims the pair are brothers, out to see the world for a spell.

 

(Laura immediately decides one of them is adopted, and guesses its Isaac because Scott is pretty protective over him and Isaac is quietly fond)

 

Strawberry Blonde’s name is Lydia Martin and is apparently a doctor, trauma surgeon to be precise, from Capitol City on Osiris. Smart young Core Doc trained up pretty – Laura was right to be wary. She pats herself on the back for her excellent judge of character.

 

Dolt’s name is Dobson, no first name. He didn’t say what he did and Laura really doesn’t like him, especially since he starts poking around their cover to go to Whitefall.

 

Whitefall is the fourth moon of Athens and owned by Patience, a business contact of Mal’s. Honestly, Laura hates her and not just because the old biddy shot her brother.

 

 ( _Over “legitimate business concerns” my ass_ Laura thinks, rolling her eyes at her brother’s nonchalance)

 

Patience is pragmatic and shrewd in all the worst ways and Laura doesn’t trust her. The only reason she’s letting Mal deal with the hag is because Patience practically owns Whitefall and is the only person with enough coin and clout to afford both the goods they got and the risk that goes with them.

 

When Lydia questions the stop, it’s direct and expected. The woman is sharp as a razor and a doctor to boot. It would make sense she’s curious about an unscheduled medical supply drop to Whitefall on what should’ve been a non-stop trip to Boros.

 

Dobson doesn’t actually say anything about their side trip. But he asks about rumors about the quality of life on the Rim and it makes Laura suspicious, like Dobson’s getting answers to questions he didn’t ask. Then Jackie makes a rude joke about Ally & Scott’s (admittedly obvious) crush on each other and Mal sends him to his bunk without dinner.

 

Laura loves her Captain.

 

 

 

 

“Mal, you might want to get up here.”

 

Laura hears Erica call over the intercom and notes the unease in her voice. Laura doesn’t like it so she pulls herself out of the catwalk shadows (her favorite parts of the ship) and runs to the bridge, arriving seconds after Mal.

 

“Someone got on the Cortex and hailed the nearest Alliance cruiser.” Erica informs Mal tightly, drumming her fingers against her control panels. Their pilot’s dark chocolate eyes are narrowed in anger, an expression closely mirrored by their Captain’s hazel ones.

 

“Tell me you scrambled it.” Mal demands and Erica huffs, tossing back her long blonde hair.

 

“Of course I did, Malcolm. What kind of amateur do you take me for?” Mal rolls his eyes (which Erica ignores) and makes a go on motion with his hand because he can hear the ‘but’ in her statement just as well as Laura can.

 

Erica huffs again. “But there’s no way to tell how much got through. The Alliance knows where we are that’s for sure. Other than that, they could have a full dossier on everyone aboard the ship or they could just have the location and that’s it. It’s a guessing game.” Erica makes a displeased face. She doesn’t like guessing games, especially the kind that call into question her own skill.

 

Mal curses in Mandarin and Laura really wants to join him. Instead she fixes her brother with a serious look and says simply “We have a mole.”

 

Mal glares out the cockpit window because he knows and he’s pissed. He slams a fist onto one of the panels, oblivious to Erica’s shout of annoyance and stalks off. Laura quickly follows because Mal doesn’t make the best decisions when he’s in such a tetchy mood. She wants to tell him that it’s probably Dobson because the guy’s seriously sketchy but Mal walks too fast in front of her.

 

He practically runs into the cargo bay, Laura quick on his heels, and they find Lydia crouched in front of her metal box.

_Shit_ is all Laura has time to think before Mal makes some quip about “forget your toothpaste?” and punching the good doc in the face. Laura wants to slam her head into a bulkhead because really, Mal? Really? The woman is probably a genius and the most gorram conspicuous person on the ship. If she were a Fed, she’d have made an effort to tone down the whole ‘Core-bred’ upbringing instead of painting target on her back for Alliance mole.

 

“Are you out of your mind?” The strawberry blonde screeches holding a hand to her bruised cheekbone and Laura actually wants to hear the answer to that too.

 

“Just about.”

 

God _damnit_ , Mal.  

 

“Okay, Mal, no.” Laura says stepping between her brother and the doctor and sighs.

This is either a really good or a really bad idea because there is a pretty long list of things Mal will not put up with and being told what to do on _his own gorram ship_ is very high up on that list. But it lets Mal know Laura is being very extra serious right now _so you better gorram_ listen _to me, Malcolm Reynolds Hale_.  

 

“She is not a Fed.” Mal is giving her that death glare he's famous for but he hasn’t pulled his gun yet so Laura takes it as a good sign and continues. “She is the most casually condescending person I have ever met, and you and I both know Feds aren’t casually condescending. They’re brusque assholes with a superiority complex. I don’t even think they can manage a subtle insult like she can.”

 

Laura’s argument is kind of bullshit and all three of them know it. There is a grain of truth to it, somewhere. Feds, undercover ones or no, make sure you know it when you insult them. Lydia, in the few hours Laura has known her, instead makes underhanded comments like calling their mess “quaint” or complimenting Scott on his “stunningly accurate portrayal of a puppy”.

 

In reality, Laura’s just trying to give her brother enough time to calm-the-fuck-down and realize how not likely it is that Lydia is the undercover Fed because _come on, Malcolm_. There is no way a government appointed public servant can afford suits of such a high caliber and expensive tailoring as the ones Lydia Martin is wearing.

 

“Fine.” Mal hisses, crossing his arms. “If she’s not the Fed then who is?”

 

“How about him?” Isaac asks from the hall to Laura’s left, nodding his head to the metal staircase behind her. Laura whips around because _when did he even get there_ and looks where Isaac gestured.

 

Straight into the barrel of Dobson’s gun.

 

Laura so called that one.

 

“Drop your firearm Captain Reynolds.”  Mal glares and curses under his breath but does as Dobson orders. He looks over at Laura as he raises his hands and gives her a wry sort of smile. “This is not my best day ever.”

 

Laura can’t help but laugh. Her brother, honestly. The action brings Dobson’s attention to her and he tells her to disarm as well. Laura smiles and it’s more of a flash of teeth than anything.

 

“I don’t carry guns around the ship.” Dobson gives her a disbelieving look but Mal nods in agreement. Laura really doesn’t. The only time she carries a fire arm is on a job and even then it’s usually a sniper rifle, not a handheld pistol. Dobson shoots her condescending look instead. “Regretting that about now aren’t we?” He asks snidely. Laura tosses her hair as puts her hands in the air.

 

“Not even a little bit.” She replies in a bored tone, conveying just how little the fact that he’s pointing a gun at her bothers her. Laura is internally gratified to see a muscle twitch under his eye. Dobson glares at Laura for a few more seconds before training his weapon on Lydia Martin’s chest.

 

“Lydia Tam, you are bound by law to stand down.”

 

Lydia gives a long suffering sigh and rolls her eyes to the ceiling as if to say god _damnit_ to the universe. Mal and Laura both look at her with surprise because _huh._

 

Laura did _not_ call that one.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got a good majority of the history from the Firefly wiki pages and some of the dialogue from episode 1 of Firefly.

**Author's Note:**

> Like the tags said earlier, Derek&Stiles aren't in this one yet. I plan of having that be later.


End file.
